You guys are damn inspiring. Here's my humble attempt:

*The Scene: The 210 Freeway in Los Angeles. Rush Hour.*

* The scenesters: Hannah, a recent grad driving to her first day on the job,
carpooling with Hayden, her boyfriend


Hannah: I can't believe you're coming with me to work.*

*Hayden: I have to. Otherwise our carbon footprint will just be ridiculous.*

*Hannah: But how does you coming with me to work even help that?*

*Hayden: Because if we carpool, then we cut our carbon footprint in half.*

*Hannah: But you don't even have a job! You're just riding in the car. You
don't even need to go anywhere. How does that count as carpooling?*

*Hayden: Because we're both in the car. That cuts the footprint by half. And
this way I'll be at your work, which is already using electricity for your
job so I won't be creating any more of a footprint there either.*

*Hannah: What the hell are you even going to do when we get there?*

*Hayden: I'm saving the environment. If more people just carpooled and lived
together we'd be able to share our energy usage. We'd cut our footprint in
half.*

*Hannah: So I'm killing the environment by driving to work, but you're
saving it by riding to work with me and doing jack shit all day.*

*Hayden: Right. And I'm not the only one. Check that guy out: the world's
tallest man is sitting in that hatchback. He's seriously scaled down his
footprint.*

*Hannah: I'm barbecuing a hamburger tonight.*

By Brian H.